Long Days in the Winter

Yesterday was a day off from school for me, and so I was home with the kids.  Dad was in at his office for the day, so I had some things planned to keep the long day busy.  Lexi came over with Baby J to visit and play, which was fun, and surprisingly Ryan was intrigued by her but not worried enough to consider her a threat (they currently have different toy interests).  Therefore she escaped his aggression but did maybe earn a pat on the head or two.

They stuck around for a couple of hours and then Laura was insistent that I make good on a vague Christmas break promise that we would go out to lunch at Panera "someday."  We bought some gift cards there as Christmas gifts for her teachers and the bakery case there was quite appealing to her.  I truly thought I was a bit crazy to try to bring both of them to an eating establishment by myself.  Laura is fine but in these situations Ryan can be a bit of a wild card.  They both turned out to do great, but still there is nothing much relaxing in overseeing three meals at once, restraining a toddler in a booth with no high chairs available, cramming in a meal during his 10 minute eating attention span!

By the time we got home I was pretty worn out and although both kids napped, my tank was definitely empty by late afternoon.  Laura is generally great with/about Ryan but on that day wanted a lot of attention and was not pleased that he was requiring so much of my time.  I was getting kind of snippy (you know you're being a bad mom but can't quite stop yourself) and Laura says to me, "Mom, are you going to quit being our mom?"

Oh, man; heartbreak.  Had to have a talk with Gooz about how moms can't quit, and I would never want to, but it was just one of those days where my patience was worn out and I was needing a break.  Not too much longer after that Dad came home and the backup support was much appreciated!  I do always feel lucky that we are there for each other to "hand off" when we need breaks, and often think of how tough it must be for single parents, military parents, etc. when you are on duty, just you, all the time.  No breaks, can't quit.