Quick rewind: December 2014, I made the decision to take down the crib and upgrade to a big boy bed. The following 4 - 5 months, Ryan refused to sleep on it, preferring the floor. Not to mention requiring someone to accompany him.
Today: Our munchkin has graduated to OUR bed. Both Mom and I sort of like having this snuggle buddy with us but the kid has grown and it's now tight quarters. For every warm snuggly moment, we have to experience:
- Space. Ryan rotates, flips, twists and turns throughout the night, pinning Mom and I to the edges of the bed.
- Kicking. Ryan goes to extreme measures by jackhammer kicking to create room.
- If that doesn't work, he will stab you with his knife-like toes.
- No Covers. I often find myself frozen with the covers down by my knees.
- Sass. Unwanted commentary about the sleeping conditions. "Dad, you breathe loud and your mouth smells horrible!"
Perfect example: Last night Ryan came in at 12:50am and made his way into the middle of the bed. With my arms at my side, he placed his right leg on top of my left arm.
In a serious/annoyed whisper:
Ryan: Dad, stop touching my leg!
Dad: My arms are at my side. There's no room.
Ryan: Go find room somewhere else!
I then laid down the law in a half-ass manner: "That's it. When you turn 4, no more sleeping in Mom and Dad's bed."
Nothing like kicking the can down the road to get your point across!
2 comments:
basically dying laughing while I read this one. You are so funny and should write more. I'd like a 'dad humor' book from you too, please.
I can't believe he got on YOUR case about being on HIS leg. OMG THE GALL! AHHAHAHAHAHAHAA.
I think I slept in my parents' room for quite some time, after awhile though they just put a quilt on the floor and said I could sleep there. Worked like a charm (except I'm a terrible sleeper now, FWIW, ha). GOOD LUCK! Funny how we think sleep issues are done at like 12 months old HAHAHAHA no.
Agreed! There are so many great moments not posted on here. I regret not having a phone or camera nearby. Most of all, I wish I had the time to write everything down. One of the best moments came as the three of us were lying in bed. I told Mom and Ryan, "Good night, I love you." Without a beat, Ryan turned to me and said, "I don't love you." T.R.O.U.B.L.E.!
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